Take Me Back to Manhattan

But then today came. And the title of yesterday's post was oh, so apropos. Not because the same thing happened all over again today, but because today was, in fact, a shit day. How does one not feel like a bad mother when they are told that onions could give their child gas but they decide that the small amount of onion that's in the recipe they make is small enough that it won't matter.  Because let me assure you - IT MATTERS. I singlehandedly put my daughter through gaseous pain all day. And because she was in such pain, nothing satisfied her. I couldn't put her in my carrier, I couldn't put her in the sling. She only wanted to be held. But that didn't slow me down. No sirree. I was still DETERMINED to get that laundry done, put the dishes in the dishwasher, and every other anal retentive thing that you might think a mom at home would do. At 3:41 PM I looked at the clock, thinking I had another hour before my chiropractor appointment and realized I needed to have left 5 minutes ago since I was walking there with Evvy. 

I don't know when it happened but somewhere in the process of leaving the house, I did something to my back. So much so that when I started walking and pushing the stroller, I questioned whether or not I would be able to make it the 10 or so blocks I had to go to get to my chiropractor. However, the little person in my head (who, by the way, I've been having endless conversations with as of late. Sometimes this person even speaks out loud to Evvy) said that walking would be good for me. I agreed and so I soldiered on. So I said to myself as I winced with each step, "Well what am I supposed to do if Evvy needs to be carried all day and I have stuff to get done around the house? I mean, seriously...am I supposed to just sit and hold her?" And the person in my head paused for a moment and said, "Yes. That's exactly what you're supposed to do. You're supposed to forget about the laundry and the dishes and whatever other minutia you were dealing with when this happened, and you are supposed to just SIT and hold her."

Do you know what I said next?

"Oh."

Because the person in my head was so right. Humbled, I made my way to the chiropractor where he proceeded to adjust me in all sorts of insane ways and then he gave Evvy some belly massage to help with the gas too. 

As I hobbled around the house this evening and my back started spasming, I thought about how ridiculous it was that I had to hurt myself to learn that I need to slow down with a 5 week old. Yay! Good for me...I'm out and about with my little one... everyone is so impressed with how well I've adjusted! But apparently Little Ms. Type A hasn't adjusted as well as she thought she had. So my body slowed itself down for me. 

Lesson learned. I'll take a doody day over a shit day any day. 

On March 20 at 7:25 in the morning, I gave birth to a little girl. My husband almost passed out when the doctor announced, "It's a girl!" It sounded exactly the way it does in all the movies and tv shows because really, there's no other way to announce it except to do it that way. My husband comes from a family of 2 boys. His brother has 3 boys. Everyone pretty much thought it was a boy. Some people determined this because of the way I was carrying. Others decided that because of my husband's family history, it was a given. I was up in the air the entire time and in the last two months decided that it was entirely possible that it could be a girl. He, on the other hand, didn't even know what that meant at first - like a girl was another species or something. It didn't take him long to learn, however. Because the truth is, when you look at your child and you realize this is YOUR child, you find places in your heart that you never knew existed before.

Evvy and I (that's her name - Evvy. That's 2 v's just in case any of you have the concern that my mother-in-law had...that it looks like Ewy when you type it on the computer. And apparently one of my sister's friends thought her name WAS Ewy so my mother-in-law isn't so crazy after all). Anyhow...what was I saying? Mommy brain is worse than pregnant brain btw. I fear I am completely LOSING my brain...but don't really care at the same time because I figure if it's important enough, I'll remember. And these days that pretty much includes making sure my kid is fed and changed and warm and dry. Anything other than that doesn't really matter. 

So Evvy and I have been on several outings. Apparently this is considered very brave for new moms. We went to a mommy and me yoga class this morning. It was our first. When I was asked how old she was (almost 3 weeks) the other moms looked at me and said, "Oh, she's your second?" 

"No, she's my first."

"Oh, is this your first outing alone with her?"

"No - actually, she came with me to get my eyebrows waxed and to therapy last week, and this week we've been to Barney's and to the Pump Station (there's truly a place here called the Pump Station and for anyone living in LA, it is an INGENIOUS resource for new moms.) And she's been to a few of our friend's houses for dinner."

They looked at me dumbfounded. I gave them the same look back. (Not really - we started chatting and everyone was really quite lovely.)

But they truly were shocked at how much we've been out and about. To me, there's not really an option. I don't do all those things in one day and when we do go out, I'm usually in desperate need of a nap upon return (which I just woke up from) but I figure I might as well get her used to being out and about since that's the kind of people we are. Out and about people.  

It has resulted in some fairly humorous moments. I truly thought I was in a movie last Friday. I couldn't have written the scene better myself and I'm sure it's appeared in a least one tv show if not a film or three as well. We were taking a trip down to Pasadena to go to Right Start because sadly they are going out of business - but that means amazing discounts and as you know, I'm a bargain shopper. My husband had a meeting that morning and asked if I needed help getting the stroller in the car before he left. For those of you who aren't familiar with the Graco "snap and go" (ummm...that would be me about 2 months ago...) it's a stroller like apparatus that your car seat just "snaps" right into and then you can "go". We'd used it around the neighborhood a few times. I told him I didn't - that I was sure I could figure it out. 

Well, I was most definitely wrong. I strolled Evvy out to the car and was feeling fabulous because this was the first time she wasn't screaming in the car seat. I was running a little late since I had not yet quite learned to factor in timing for going places with a baby. I snapped the car seat into the back seat, threw my very chic Stella McCartney for LeSportsac diaper bag in the front (I felt the need to include that because I'm trying really hard to still be fashionable while carrying a DIAPER BAG), and went to break down the snap and go stroller to throw in the trunk. But this was not the easy task that I expected it to be. Five minutes later, Evvy is still content in her car seat but I am sweating and swearing and feel like I'm about to have a meltdown because I can't get the freaking stroller to collapse. So I do the only thing there is to do - attempt to get the entire thing in my trunk. I tried several different angles, all to no avail. I look at my kid in the back seat, who appears to be looking back at me although all the books tell me she can only see 8 inches in front of her. I look at the stroller. I make a snap decision to be a HORRIBLE mother already and I lock my kid in the car and RUN as fast as I possibly can with the stroller to our front door and put it in the house. Granted, the car is parked right in front of our house, it's not 100 degrees out or anything - but really...I feel like I've broken the first rule of parenting 101 by locking my kid in the car. I sprint back to the car, unlock it, get in the back seat momentarily to make sure my baby still has all 10 fingers and toes and still isn't screaming...and off we go to bargain shop. 

See why I called this post adventures in babysitting?